These are real things that clients – and potential clients – have said to me over the years. And you can see why the potential clients didn’t turn into actual clients.

‘Sorry it’s taken us so long to go through the copy. However, we can’t move the deadline, so can you turn it round for us really quickly?’

‘I really like your work but you’re too expensive for me. Can you recommend anyone cheaper?’

‘I know it’s Friday lunchtime but can you work over the weekend and get this to us on Monday morning?’ To which I replied: ‘No problem. I charge double for weekend working.’ To which the client replied: ‘I’m sure it can wait until Wednesday.’

‘Thanks for your quote. Now can you give me a really good discount?’

‘Sorry we haven’t paid you yet but we posted a new cheque book to our accounts lady and the postman’s cart was stolen.’

Do you do free pitches to win work? My experience is that some freelancers/agencies will never pitch for free and some always do.

Here’s why I normally don’t:

1. Potential clients nick my ideas

Especially in the case of PR and marketing pitch documents, I’ve come across far too many instances where potential clients ask three or four freelancers or agencies to come up with a full set of campaign ideas. Then, having digested the contents of them all, the potential client mysteriously announces they have decided to do it in-house because they ‘don’t really have the budget’.

So they nick the best of the ideas from all the documents and implement it themselves. Whether they are able to implement it properly themselves is another argument but it still makes me REALLY cross that they a) have the gall to do this and b) get away with it.

My colour inkjet gave up the ghost the other day and, because I had no idea about what kind of printer I should buy to replace it, I asked my IT guy.

He suggested two: either this one from Brother or this Lexmark Pinnacle Pro 901 For some reason, the Lexmark printer was marked down from £299 to £99. I bought that one. (Although I have to admit I was a bit suspicious – why was it at such a low price?) Anyhow, it has turned out to be such a great printer that I decided to write a review about it.

As a freelancer, you probably spend too many hours hunched over your computer keyboard. I know I do.

The result is that I’m starting to get round shoulders, so I’ve been given a series of exercises to try and straighten my posture.  I thought I’d share them with you.

1. Get a big bath towel and roll it up on the floor like a big sausage. Lie on it so your spine  is on the towel and stretch your arms wide open on the floor. Stay in this stretch for at least two minutes. If you happen to have a foam tube, then it’s even more effective. I don’t have one at home so I also do this stretch at the gym where there are loads of foam tubes.

2. Stand in a doorway with you arms at right angles on the door jam. Take a SMALL step forward with both feet and hold the stretch for 20 seconds. Repeat three times. Make sure your arms are at shoulder height to get the maximum stretch.

Welcome to guest writer, James Adams, who provides advice on how to set up your home office.

If you want working from home to be successful and productive, then it should be separate from your personal space, distraction free, and inviting. Avoid the temptations to cobble together a desk and chair in the corner of a room and calling it your office. Take it from me, it won’t work! So if you’re taking your work seriously, then take these ten essentials on board and apply them to your freelance office.

1. Room

Rather than the kitchen table, take over a room in the house as your home office. It will be easier to claim this space on your taxes and serve as a barrier between your personal and work spaces. Train people to leave you alone when the door to your office is closed. Keep this area away from the highly trafficked areas within your house so you can have peace and quiet.

I’ve been freelance for many years now – in fact for twice as long as I was an employee – but there are certain things I just can’t help worrying about.

• What if I get really ill and can’t work?

• What if I don’t get any work next month?

• What if I win all the projects I’ve quoted for – how will I cope?

• What if my brand new client doesn’t like the copy I’ve just written?

• Should or shouldn’t I go away for a fortnight’s holiday – what if I miss out on a plum project when I’m away?

After all these years, I never seem to change. I worry because I’ll have too much work and worry that I won’t have enough. Where’s the logic in that? And I worry about things that MIGHT happen.

Maybe it’s just me, or maybe it’s general freelance paranoia that goes with the job.